10 June 2021 07:38

MARRIAGE IS A GAMBLE IT IS SAID SO. I do not think it is true. It is the best institution to live a happy married life and make progress. Rest of the systems are just the offshoots but not the reality. The QUESTION ARISES HOW TO GET TO IT AND MAKE IT HAPPIER ONE. ANSWER; it is said each problem has a solution provided one is determined to find it out and cipher out which is the best solution out of various options. Thus marriage also needs to get to certain procedures. The first one consists in HOW TO SELECT A PARTNER, one needs to get at this write-up, read it and practise on the system provided. 2nd it is also said that marriage brings two bodies into one soul. It is true and it needs to be understood that marriage needs understanding and compatibility. As 2 individuals are unknown, they need time to meet each other before marriage to observe, understand and make efforts to adjust with each other's manners, habits, thoughts and aspirations. In the beginning it will be generally irritating and doubtful but if there exist inner feelings of love, the more both will meet, take time to express, communicate, understand the viewpoint of each other and feel persuaded with the logical discussion and conclusion, the understanding, accommodation and compatibility will overcome the initial doubts and hesitations. 3rd it is said that marriage is not only of the boy and the girl but also of the families. It is true it needs the adjustment of the boy and the girl amongst themselves and also with each other's family. This shall require after engagement in the social system of marriage and before in the case of love marriage, to get to each other's families, meet them, understand them and get adjusted to them through observation, discussions, respect and in firm belief that as younger ones it is easier for both of them to adjust with the future in-laws than to expect them to adjust with these 2 going to get married. THUS THIS INITIAL EFFORT, TIME TAKEN TO ADJUST AND HAVING A GLANCE AT 'SYLLABUS FOR PRE-MARRIAGE EDUCATION AND GUIDANCE' and also to converse, for the girl with the mother and boy with the father as to what difficulties they faced by citing those hard situations and how they succeeded to overcome those and how they have succeeded to make their life a happier and loving one as a couple, this pre-marriage discussion I am sure will surely influence the boy and the girl to understan each other better and do ALL TO ADJUST AND TO TURN THEMSELVES COMPATIBLE AND LOVING COUPLE AFTER MARRIAGE. .... RE: family feuds, dowry etc. I shall cover in the next write-up. tks 10-6-21 WHY ONE SHOULD GO IN FOR MARRIAGE IN THIS FREE WORLD. It must be remembered any decision which is not taken at the right time, is a miss and results in regrets with no recourse as the damage which could be avoided, has already happened. In such a situation, adjustment and reconciliation remain the only answer, which also though many wish for, but in hesitation, fear and in indecisiveness, fail to find the right choice they wish for and as such most of them continue in regrets, fear and many a time go into depression. It is said, old age is a curse, it gets mitigated when one is married and leads his/her life as a loving couple. HENCE TO MARRY AT A PROPER TIME IS ESSENTIAL. One may avoid natural urge for some time but not for longer, if longer, the chance for right choice and right selection gets lost and except for a COMPROMISE no option is left out unless one decides not to marry. Various forms of relationships have been developed, but sooner or later, all tend to fail as such relationships remain LOOSE AND UNRELIABLE. HENCE TO MARRY AND TO MARRY AT A PROPER TIME, BOTH ARE ESSENTIAL, to enjoy couple life, love and be with the children, be motivated and put in all efforts for progress, to fulfill the NATURAL URGE OF MINE, MY CREATION, MY LOVE AND MY POSSESSION AND MY SECURITY. Then the question arises what is the right age to get married, it is a fluid question as many these days give priority to STATUS, HAVE ONE'S OWN HOUSE AND OWN MEANS OF TRANSPORT, ALSO THE SPAN OF LIFE HAS ALSO GROWN which in general goes for men at 80 and for women at 85, even more. HENCE IT IS FELT THAT THERE IS NO HURRY FOR MARRIAGE AND LET ME ENJOY LIFE IN FREEDOM FOR SOME TIME AND PRIORITISE FOR THE CAREER than think of getting married. Hence in general for girl, age for marriage is ranging from 25 to 28 while for the boys it ranges from 28 to 32. It must not be forgotten that search for the right choice in most cases,in these modern days of independent society, also takes at least one year due to the factors that marriage is not so urgent, hesitation and indecisiveness etc. etc. also overtake CONCLUSION; TO MARRY IS ESSENTIAL, DO NEVER MISS IT, REMAIN WITHIN THE AGE AS MENTIONED ABOVE, AT ALL COSTS, DECIDE WHAT YOU WANT, GET INTO METHOD OF SELECTION, READING, ADVICE ETC. DO NEVER FORGET THAT NONE IS PERFECT AND AS SUCH DECISION ABOUT WHAT ONE WANTS REMAINS THE RIGHT COURSE OF SELECTION AND COMPROMISE. IT IS SAID CHANCE AND DESTINY ALSO PLAY A GREAT ROLE, TRUE PERHAPS, BUT BE EDUCATED AND GET EDUCATED MUST, I THINK, REMAIN THE PRE-REQUISITE CRITERIA. tks