SELF IDENTITY 4-3-23 -WHAT DOES IT MEAN -WHETHER IT IS WHEREBY ONE ASSUMES THAT ONE IS RIGHT, COMPLETELY RIGHT -AS SUCH WHAT ONE THINKS ABOUT, WHAT ONE SAYS, ACTS AND BEHAVES ETC. ONE IS RIGHT ALWAYS AND IN EVERY RESPECT -RESULTANTLY NO ONE CAN MATCH HIM/HER NOR CHALLENGE HIM/HER. AND BY CONTINUING AND INSISTING THAT ONE IS RIGHT, -AFTER SOME TIME HE/SHE BECOMES SUPREME IS AFRAID OF NONE TO CONTEST AND CHALLENGE HIM/HER EITHER. -QUESTION ARISES AS TO WHAT ARE THE CAUSES WHICH DEVELOP SUCH AN ATTITUDE AND BEHAVIOUR? -REASONS ARE MANY, FOR EXAMPLE. -VICTIMISATION, RACIAL/RELIGIOUS DISCRIMINATION THREATENED/THRASHED AND EVEN PUT TO JAIL FOR NO FAULT OF HIS/HER, DOWNGRADED, HATED EVERYWHERE AND BY ALMOST EVERYONE, HARSH AND CHAOTIC BEHAVIOUR OF PARENTS IN HIS/HER BRINGING UP, INTOLERANCE IN SCHOOLS, COLLEGES, GROUPS, ASSOCIATIONS, MORESO IN RELATIONSHIP IN BOY AND GIRL, HUSBAND AND WIFE ETC. ETC. -AS SUCH FURTHER QUESTION ARISES WHETHER IT IS GOOD TO UPKEEP AND STAND BY SELF IDENTITY, ANSWER PERHAPS SEEMS TO BE -IF IN SELF DEFENCE, YES, IT MAY BE RIGHT -ONE MAY PERHAPS BE RIGHT IN HIS/HER OWN AND AND PERSONAL THINKING -BUT IN REAL LIFE, IT CREATES LOTS OF DRAWABACKS IN ONE’S BEHAVIOUR -1. ISOLATION 2. ENEMITIES 3. NO FRIENDS, NO RELTIONS ETC. 4. NONE DARES TO TALK, DISCUSS AND BE ASSOCIATED 5. LOSS OF TOLERANCE 6. QUICK FLARE UP IN ANGER AND INTOLERANCE ETC. ETC. -IS IT TRUE THAT SUCH A PERSON REMAINS ISOLATED AND THERE IS NONE TO BE ASSOCIATED WITH HIM/HER -NO IT IS NOT A FACT, HE/SHE ALSO FINDS THE FOLLOWINGS TO BE IN HIS/HER COMPANY MOST OF THE TIME, ALWAYS PERHAPS: 1. FLATTERS 2. PROFITERS TO ENCASH SELF GAINS. -OBSERVATIONS; -THE FACT HOWEVER REMAINS THAT SUCH PERSONS IN THEIR BEHAVIOUR TO ACCLAIM SELF IDENTITY REMAIN IN SELF DECEIT, HENCE SUCH PERSONS DO NOT REALISE THAT MAN IS A SOCIAL BEING, HE/SHE NEEDS OTHERS TO TALK, COMPETE, PROGRESS, LOVE, HATE, DISPUTE, FIGHT AND AS SUCH HAS TO REMAIN IN COMPANY OF SOME IN THE FORM OF RELATIONSHIPS LIKE FAMILIES, GROUPS OF BELIEFS, RELIGION ETC. BUSINESS AND/OR WORKPLACES. -ALSO SUCH PERSONS DO NOT REALISE THAT THEIR SO CALLED SELF IDENTITY WILL BRING IN 1. IRRITATION, 2.INTOLERANCE. 3.ARROGANCE 3. LOSS OF HEALTH AND HAPPINESS. -PERHAPS SUCH PERSONS BEIEVE THAT BY ASSUMING THE ATTITUDE OF SELF IDENTITY, MAKES THEM PROMINENT FOR THEIR THINKING AND BEHAVIOUR AS ALSO BY THWARTING CRITICISM AND BY RESISTANCE TO ALL SUCH NEGATIVE BEHAVIOURS AND ACTIONS BY OTHERS, DO ENCOURAGE THEM TO STAND FIRM AND STEADFAST IN DEFENDING THEIR SELF IDENTITY, NOT AND NEVER TO RELENT TO WHAT OTHERS SAY AND BELIEVE. INSTEAD THEY BELIEVE THAT THEY ARE THE MOST INTELLIGENT AND FARSIGHTED, WHAT THEY THINK IS THE BEST FOR THEM TO LEAD THE LIFE WITH SATISFACTION AND PRIDE. -ALAS, SUCH PERSONS NEVER BELIEVE THAT THEIR SUCH BEHAVIOUR WILL CREATE DULLNESS IN THEIR LIFE, DEPRIVE THEM OF CHARM OF LIFE, DESTROY THEIR RELATIONSHIPS FROM CHILDHOOD TILL NOW, THEY ARE NOT BOTHERED NOR DO THEY CARE AS TO WHAT OTHERS THINK OF THEM, THEY ARE RIGHT AND RIGHT ALWAYS, AS SUCH LET THOSE ONLY GET ASSOSICATED WITH THEM WHO BELIEVE IN THINKING AS OF SUCH PERSONS AND ALSO APPRECIATE THEIR BEHAVIOUR. ADVICE; It is essential to listen to others, if they or someone is right, must appreciate them, him/her, and if not right, become tolerant to put forward your views and if not accepted, just get away and be least associated with such persons who do not agree with your views. However never forget if you claim to be right, you must think also that the other persons can also be right besides in addition one needs company and relationships to live life, probably for living in a better, it becomes essential to accommodate with the views of others and do all to adjust with self identity to fit in relationship with all those you come in contact and live around. ……………………………………………………………………………………………………. Written by vadevloond, founder of Marriage Guidance New Concept Cost free marriage bureau since 2015, to contact vasdevloond at 9811943867 vasdevloond@gmail.com -